Maybe it’s the rainy weather or negative energy floating around, but whatever it is, I’m having a hard time emotionally this week. Yesterday, I felt so “ugly” that I decided to take a vow of silence in the evening. I told my family I was going home and going to sleep. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, I just needed to be alone.
Even though I know this is the best remedy (if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all, right?), I still carried guilt last night and even this morning over it. So I asked myself, is it better to have sucked it up and spent time with the family when I’m clearly very moody or let them enjoy their evening while I retreated to work on what’s going on with me? I tend to believe from experience that when I don’t retreat, I cause more problems because no one likes being around a sourpuss.
In contemplating if I did the right thing, how I can move forward with my day and how I can ultimately feel better, I received an email this morning that could not have come at a better time. I subscribe to many daily spiritual emails, one of which is the “DailyOM Horoscope.”
Today’s email was entitled “Curbing Disconnect.” I was intrigued. I’m a Pisces so our emotions run deep naturally. Turns out the entire email was about being moody and how solitude may be the best answer. Go figure. Here’s a piece from that email:
“The tranquility that surrounds us when we have retreated from outer-world pressures allows us to hear the quiet voice of the inner self, which can help balance our mood. As we reconnect with this most authentic of selves, we are reminded of our passions and preferences, and all that defines us as unique individuals. The emotional upheaval troubling you will fade today as you use solitude to achieve a more grounded state.”
I’m taking the advice of my intuition and the horoscope today. It’s difficult when I work in an industry that’s all about connecting with people. This doesn’t mean I won’t answer phone calls or emails, but it does mean that I’m going to make an effort to seek out more quiet time than normal. I will also have to make an effort to not let my mood affect how I interact with others.
As you may have guessed, this is not the first time I’ve felt like this. I used to take things out on people. I would walk around happy to be mad. As I saw what that did to my relationships, I quickly learned that this was an area of my life I needed to work on. Over the last several years, I’ve done just that putting a concentrated effort on looking for the right perspective rather than letting my mood dictate my world.
On days like yesterday and today, what usually happens is I’ll spend more energy just trying to get balanced and stay there, which means my energy is drained pretty quickly. I think that’s okay as long as I’m moving in the right direction, treating others well, and allowing myself to take it easy.
How do I achieve this much sought-after balance? I start by being aware that I need the balance. I remove myself from negative situations and people. I seek out things that will make me laugh or smile. I make sure I do something for myself that I enjoy, even if it’s little such as changing my scenery and treating myself to lunch at a restaurant. When it’s particularly bad, I tell my loved ones I’m not feeling so great and I need a bit of quiet time. Today I went an extra step and spent a little more time in meditation asking for negative energy to leave and to be surrounded with positive energy along with protection from my guides. I also cleaned the energy of my surroundings with sage. I don’t quite feel like myself yet, but at least I’m on the right track. For that, I am proud.